Senior Fun

It's fun just trying to keep up with Erin...she's playing tennis, she's practicing a play, she's writing reports for school, going to church, working a little, and bringing friends in and out with her all the time. I'm never sure if she's going to be eating with us...we often leave a plate in case she comes in.

When she's here, she sits with the kids and reads books or plays games if she has time. It's not easy being the big kid in a house of littles, but she is doing a great job being a good sister and friend. Congrats Erin...just elected Senior Class President, tennis player, and she gets to play a singing pirate in the fall play! 

Quote of the Day

Today, I snuck in an opportunity to tell Jordan that when she looked for a husband, she should look for someone like her dad...someone who helped, who was kind, and played with kids too.

She's never hear me say these things before, and I've never hinted at her future beyond the week before...but she looked me in the eye and said, "I'll just look on Christian Mingle."   ...we might be watching too much TV...

FULL Birthday

Wednesday, September 24, 2014...



~ Text messages from kids before breakfast
~ Breakfast with a friend
~ Beth Moore Bible study at FBC
~ Cupcake Making Project
~ PHONE CALL FROM ADOPTION SPECIALIST - "Sorry it's taken so long, I have all the paperwork ready, I have to get it in a formal packet, then we'll have to meet for you to sign it in front of a notary, and then we'll have you on the schedule...."

At this point, I was almost in tears...just because she had told us more than anyone since June! And she told us a possible date, and it's not this month, but it's coming up. We're letting family know, but we're waiting for an official GOTCHA DAY ANNOUNCEMENT when we've seen the paperwork and we get an official time on a certain judge's docket. THIS was a great Birthday Present.

~ Reading Meeting at Primary School
~ Checked out kids early, traveled to Vilonia for Erin's tennis match
~ Birthday dinner at Colton's in Russellville
~ Stopped by the ATU intramural fields to see Lauren's SUPER team play a few minutes
~ Birthday cards in the mailbox when I got home...


A beautiful fall day!

Cupcakes

I haven't made cupcakes in awhile...and when I saw a recipe for FUNNEL CAKE CUPCAKES, I just had to try them. I don't usually start from scratch...but I went shopping for ingredients, followed the instructions to the letter, and ended up with some tasty cakes!

Moments

Moments like these seem to continue to sneak up on me...I was gathering some flowers from our garden to refill a vase and Jordan wanted to help. Of course, I let her, and then she says something like, "I've never cut flowers before."

Then she asks for another vase to take some to her teacher in. I loved watching her trim the leaves off, and chose which ones went where. It's the little moments like this when I can tell she's really enjoying something. She may not admit it, but she likes it too.

In Between

I feel like I live between two worlds. My old self was get ready every day, go out and see how many people I could meet, and learn people's names. I wasn't really thinking about long term relationships, I was funny and talked fast and was a good college friend to have. However, when I learned that I was harsh and abrasive, I started taking more care with my words and learned to not lean on sarcasm as the best way to win friends.

After a few years of being married, having children, being heavily involved with the church, and starting two businesses, I became so frustrated with being misunderstood that I became more comfortable being alone. It's not easy being alone, and I wasn't really, I have had 3-4 children in the house for 20 years...but my best friend and confidant became Richard. He and I understand each other. If I'm mean, harsh or bitter, he gets me out of it, gives me space, and choses to love me anyway.

So, fast-forward 15 years and we find ourselves without friends to go out with, no social life to speak of, and the noticeable loss of relationships outside the walls of our home.

No matter that we can go to church any Sunday and say "hello" to every person in the worship center, calling most by name. We can go to a ball game and be able to tell you the children's names of the 20 people surrounding us. I know that if we had a major crisis, people would come to our help. But when it comes to wanting someone to have lunch with, we are alone.

This is so unlike what Christ wants for us. It may be easier to not have to deal with people, but that is EXACTLY what we are called to do. I know that relationships are crucial to our spiritual growth.

This week I've been to one Bible study and started in a new Life Group. I've made plans to have lunch with two friends next week. I'm going to get out of this rut of being alone.

Surprise!

Richard suggested lunch out today, and I didn't argue. We drove around the square to a little restaurant, but the door said they were closed. Then, all of the sudden, Richard stopped, rolled down my window and Ryan and Katelyn were parked in front of the next store! We all headed to a restaurant and it was the sweetest meal with my sweet children. Only Lauren was missing...and precious thing was in church with her friends!

I didn't tear up during the meal, I was just so happy, but all day I've been thinking I am so touched that these two VERY BUSY college kids went to an 8am church service in Fayetteville, then drove over an hour to eat lunch with ME. Ryan had books in the car because he was going to study for one of his tests on Monday. Katelyn was driving them home.

I'm loved. I'm blessed. Thank you Jesus.

Women...

A more interesting weekend I've never had. I've been to MANY women's retreats/conferences, but never as the newbie: I decided to go to our (new) church's women conference in Little Rock 2 weeks ago. I paid my late registration fee, and told one of my new church friends that I was going. She was the sweetest friend and said, "Of course, you're coming, and coming with me! You can stay with me and we'll have so much fun!"

I drove myself to LR, I met my friend in the middle of a PACKED room with 2200 other women. I didn't know another person in the row around me, and so it was hard to know who was with our church and who was from another church. No worries, I just started talking to folks, and everything was new but not too awkward. The worship time absolutely blew me away, I was literally teary joining with so many singing to the Lord and preparing for a weekend to focus on Him. It was awesome.

And then the first speaker came up. Honestly...it's hard for me to trust a size 2 woman, who has to be 50 years old and looked 21 tops. But when she started bringing it, I couldn't write fast enough. I completely forgot that I didn't know but about 4 people in the room, and that I wasn't sure where I would spend the night.

The night ended at a table at PF Changs, laughing hard with 3 women I hadn't met before and my friend. OK, so somewhere after the first few minutes I realize I may be older than these ladies...I'm guessing 15 years older. It's OK, I can get along with anyone.. When my precious friend mentioned getting a roll away for their room, I could tell by their faces, she hadn't told them I was staying with them. One of my worst fears is imposing on people...so I immediately make excuses and plans to drive to Conway to stay at Rhea Lana's. (I had already OKd a bed there in case this very thing happened) My friend felt a little bad, but I assured her I would be perfectly fine, and I was.

This is why the weekend was so strange:
I'm 100% sure I've never been to a church event where I felt as insignificant or unknown as this. I have been the person who greets people at the door, invites people to sit by me, and asks everyone their names and makes the room reservations for anyone who needs one.

It was OK to not be known, and it was OK to not be a leader, but it was so incredibly humbling and perhaps freeing for a few moments. However, God did not wire me to sit quietly. The next morning my friend didn't answer her phone, I couldn't find her in the room, I saw another few folks from our church, but they didn't motion me over (I'm such a wimp...but didn't want to ask to sit with them if there wasn't a seat available....) anyway, I helped myself to a seat in the middle of a row of ladies from other places, and just made some new friends.

After the first session, and a break out session, another lady from my new life group texted me and asked me to sit with her later. During lunch, a new friend from the first night asked me to eat lunch with her.
God was providing and I was accepting.
God was speaking, and I was listening.
God was there, and I did everything I could to not let my feeling of inadequacy, un-comfortableness, and doubt distract me from His message to me.

I'm not sure why I'm writing this except for the record of a time of unknown in my life that I've never had, and for the reminder to love others, reach out to others, listen to others, and make others feel loved in similar situations.

For all I know, the ladies thought I was a snob for not talking to them, (that would break my heart if that were true) but I was trying to not infringe on their experience by being an unwanted tag a long.

I pray God will give us a specific place to serve and grow quickly in our new church home.

Remix

I started the Beth Moore Bible study on I and II Thessalonians today. As God often does when I'm present and available for a Word, He provided gifts of blessing and insight.

1) On the way to school this morning I told the kids I was going to make a new friend today. I have someone on my heart, and I thought today would be a day we would come into contact with one another, but as the Bible study group was coming in, a young mom came in that hadn't been to the study before. I recognized her and asked her to sit down at my table. Turns out, we shared a Bible, talked being a busy mom (she has 5 children) and was my new friend for the day.

2) The lesson focused on the writers of Thessalonians. In true Beth Moore style, she took us to the Word and uncovered the way Paul, Silas and Timothy got together. Paul and Barnabas had a parting of ways. Silas came forward and traveled with Paul, then they met Timothy, who they hadn't known before. Later Timothy becomes Paul's son in the faith, and meant more to him than any other friend. Paul and Barnabus were REMIXED and God worked miracles in their lives, with people they didn't know before.

This is what we have done, we have changed churches after 19 years, we are learning from new people, we are making new friends, and who knows what God has for us there that we couldn't do at FBC. It wasn't a break up, we didn't have a blow up like Paul and Barnabus. But God DID call us, and we did change some things, and we still have the same priorities in our lives and for our children.

We're just REMIXED.

Taste of Pink

Richard and I ate lunch at the semi-famous local restaurant South Park. The daily lunch special is under $8, and all the food (entrée and 4 vegetables) comes on one plate. As in, all the food is touching...and then they deliver a piece of dessert. Today's dessert was cherry chip cake...and one bite brought my mind to every birthday I had before I was 10. The taste was a complete throw back to getting to go to the grocery store with my mom and picking out a box of cake for my party. I always wanted a pink cake...not sure why, I wasn't a cutie cute girl. But I always picked pink...and today's dessert tasted just like it. I've never had a taste that was so specific to a memory...but this was it.

Super Saturday

So, it was going to be a long Saturday without Richard and I just decided we needed to go and do something. I typically like to have a plan, but I decided to play it calm and just get on the road. Erin was taking the ACT in the morning, so we waited until noon to go, and we were cutting it close to the Razorback game! To say my kids love Ryan, is an understatement. They run to him, hug him, and let him pick them up to get up even closer. Katelyn loves on everyone of them too, and is so precious to any one of them who needs a little bit of extra attention.

We went to their church and watched part of the game on the big screens, I took the littles to see the cousins for about 45 minutes, Erin and I dropped by Ashley's event to check out their set up, and after the game we went to Wilson Park to play. What a wonderful day, spending it with 20 year olds who actually love these young, loud, busy children. It was a great day!

Getting Better

Hey! I'm getting better at this. The goal is to have a style that will last for 4-6 days. Jordan is a crazy sleeper, so keeping it tied up, unfuzzy, and coifed has been a challenge. By the time she's 16 I should have more than 2 things I can do with her hair!

Family

 

Grandma and Grandpa came to visit Labor Day, I didn't take nearly enough pictures, but I couldn't resist these. Grandpa sat with Cam for over an hour working on a puzzle, and it was the most still Cameron had been the entire weekend! It was precious and I LOVE these moments that make him a child who belongs in our family.

Quote of the Day

One of many conversations that I heard in the car last week...

Jordan: Ewww! A spider is in the car!
Cameron: Cool, let it bite you!
Jordan: Cameron! ... Mom!
Cameron: Then you can be Spidergirl and we can work together!
Jordan: I don't want to be Spidergirl.
Cameron: But I'm going to be Spiderman... If I can find a spider to bite me.

Determined

Our senior is on the back of the new Panther Gear trailer! The picture cracks me up...not because she's not tough, but because she is so even-keeled, she seldom gets this face of disgust and anger. She is determined. So far this year she's involved with Tennis, Swim, Soccer, Quiz Bowl, teacher cadets...and running for class president. LOVE HER.