My firstborn is capable, confident and strong. If he didn't have the skills and the mental toughness I know he has, or he wasn't firmly secure in his relationship with the Lord, I'd definitely worry about him more. The last phase of Ranger school is swamps and he completed it 5 days ago. Unfortunately, with crazy circumstances, he didn't pass and will return to Florida after the holidays to brave the water, the cold and the training again. He can do it. I have no doubt.
Disappointment, discouragement and melancholy have filled my days here. He is my sill my boy. Not because we don't believe in him, or the USA, or Ranger program. But because when you don't get what you expect or what you believe you deserve, it can be a storm to get through, and family stands by you.
I'm thankful that we tried to teach our children (from early on) that they weren't going to get everything they wanted, every part they tried out for, every grade they expected. We taught them life wasn't fair but it didn't matter because God wants our best and that will always be good enough. It doesn't make things easier to take, but knowing that God has our BEST in mind, and He works through all things, and He works before us, with us and after us...well, it is comforting and gives me hope.
I can't wait to hug my son, and of course, Katelyn too. He's made every effort to be with us every single Christmas, well, except the first one when he was due, and I'm ready for us all to be in the same house again.
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